Your personal development plan, for adulthood

A personal development plan is a set of expectations, goals and ambitions that you set out to achieve. And should you fail to achieve them in your predicted timeline, it can also send you into a spiral of disgust in yourself. I have been making these plans for as long as I have been able to think, so I have plenty of experience. Now, I will share with you my key take aways on how to plan your life out.

Don’t! If you can help it

Honestly, there is nothing more de-motivating (in my opinion) than feeling you aren’t achieving your own goals. It’s fine when I don’t achieve things in set environments like and work and school, because there are systems in place to get me back on track. If I fall off the track in my own plans, I know I don’t have the systems in place to get back on it. I tend to choose to extend it or question if that goal was truly necessary to achieve in the first place.

It really depends on what kind of person you are.

I have accepted, actually embraced, the fact that I can give up on things easily. I tend to, because I don’t see the meaningful benefit to the overall impression of my life. So, where I can help it, I don’t plan my personal development, especially on stuff that doesn’t bring any benefit to me.

Here is how to do it right

Now for a lot of us, we will struggle with my first point. So, here is how to do a personal development plan for life, right. You need to ask yourself some deep questions, but hopefully the process won’t take too long.

The aim is to evaluate the goal/ambition/milestone and understand what it means to you. There is nothing worse than being motivated to do something for the wrong reasons. Challenges will always be present, so make sure your reason is strong enough to carry you through them.

Answering these questions, will give you clarity on your motivation to continue pursuing your goal. The clarity and motivation combined, will help you stay consistent to the cause. Some of them could be combined in one question, but I find keeping them separate will make them less overwhelming when trying to think of my answer:

1. How does this make you feel?
2. Why do you think you feel that way?
3. Is it worth keeping/maintaining/continuing in your life?
4. Why/why not?
5. What are you going to do about it now?

1. How does this make you feel?

This is to evaluate whether it’s draining you or exciting you. Maybe it might feel painful, or upsetting. The aim here is to identify what you feel when working towards that goal. Depending on what it is your trying to achieve, they will inflict different feelings in you.

2. Why do you think you feel that way?

Now, identify why you feel that way. It could a physical cause, or it could be something deeper than that. Understanding what is causing you to feel the emotion(s) established in section 1, helps you with section 3.

3. Is it worth keeping/maintaining/continuing in your life?

Now you know what your feeling, and why, it’s time to determine whether it’s worth maintaining/keeping. There are very few things in life that are definite and permanent. If you remember this, it means you acknowledge that you can have a choice in the end to change the situation. Since section 4 looks deeper as to the reason for your answer to this question, this is limited to a yes or no answer.

4. Why/ Why not?

Justifying why you made your answer in section 3. Sometimes there is a timing issue. Maybe you need to give something a longer chance before making any changes to the current decision. Maybe it does/doesn’t resonate with you (it just doesn’t sit right) – and that’s ok. As long as you have made that justification, based on your feelings and circumstances, nothing else should matter because the decision is made.

5. What are you going to do about it now?

You have already made the decision, so this step should seem less daunting. For example: If you have decided it feels bad (1), because it’s not enjoyable (2), and you have to keep doing it (3), because you haven’t seen any options that can handle your circumstances (4). Then your next step could be look at aspects that are tolerable/enjoyable (go through the questions again but looking for the positives). Then look for options/opportunities that utilise those areas that you value/enjoy, and flexible to your situation. This could take some time, but at least you aren’t stuck and clueless of what’s available, you’re just stuck. But once an opportunity comes, then you already have your reasons to make the change.

The questions and the personal development plan

The idea is you can use these questions for your current life plans and goals. And if you don’t have those, then that’s an opportunity for me to write a post on how to come up with life goals.

These are also useful in the workplace, so you might find personal development plan being used there too. But who said you can’t develop in your personal life as well?

Last thing

Just because you have a personal development plan, that does not mean you have to stick to it. Life changes you throughout the duration of it, so why do you think your goals and ambitions will stay the same? It’s perfectly fine for the goals to change. It’s your personal development plan. Who is going to come over and tell you, “You can’t do that, that’s not part of the plan”. Your life is your life, and the plan is to live it however you see fit. So, continue to change it, modify it, update it, because as we get exposed to more, we change a little. And there is nothing wrong with that, as you often do have a choice to continue with it or to change again.

The TL;DR (Too long; Didn’t read):

• Personal development plans are not just for work – You can have one for your life, and it’s simply called “goals/ambitions” or “things I want to do before it ends”
• It requires some evaluation and reasoning – Without it, when a challenge hits you during your path to achieving the goal you will lack the motivation to continue.
• The 5 questions –
  • How does this make you feel?
  • Why do you think you feel that way?
  • Is it worth keeping/maintaining/continuing in your life?
  • Why/why not?
  • What are you going to do about it now?
• Life is fluid, so your personal development should also be fluid – It’s ok for plans/goals to change, that’s what life does. It exposes us to new things, which can change what we want to experience during our time here.